Albert Einstein spanked my ass

aka: Just another boring night at Miss Kitty's Parlour

After much debate - because I was tired - I decided to have an energy drink, quick-change my clothes, refresh my makeup, and meet Kim, Lucas, Julie, and Anita at Miss Kitty's - for the "New Whoreleans Mardi Gras" party. It took a lot to remind myself that I could go out and just be chill - I didn't need to be "on".

I got to the club a little before 10:30 and found the group right away (we always stick to the bar closest to the door when we're waiting for people). Kim and Juls made a big deal about my hair (even I think it's looked amazing for the last 2 days) and Kim went on & on about me looking thin (which I appreciated, despite knowing size 18/20 NEVER looks "thin"!).

We headed straight to Tiffany, our favorite bartender. She's known for pouring good drinks - and the last time I was there she comp'd nearly everything Cezar, Nick, Lisa and I drank. I ordered a beer and tipped her $20 - explaining that it was for treating me so well last time. She expressed much appreciation and love for our group.

Within seconds, some guy - some attractive guy - approached me. I figured he was looking to meet Julie or Kim (that's the usually the case) but, no, he was into me. Quelle suprise! He looked very... Persian? I'm not sure. He told me his name is Albert. I told him I would forget - because I absolutely cannot remember names. He told me to remember "Eistein" - and I did. For the rest of the night, he was Albert Einstein. We talked for a bit until Julie led me away to find the rest of our group again.

One of the probs with clubbing in LA is that you see people who look like famous people - but don't know if it's actually them or an impersonator. Last night, Marilyn Manson appeared to be there. I pointed him out to Julie, who insisted he didn't look a thing like Marilyn (she did the same thing with the guy who looked, vaguely, like Dave Navarro). I think the massive amounts of people who, throughout the night, stopped dead in their tracks and stared - trying decide whether or not it actually was him - would agree with me. It's hard to know. His wife has performed there many times. If he were to go out in LA on a Friday, Miss Kitty's seems logical.

Who Is The Guy On The Right?

So maybe I really did see Marilyn Manson last night (I talked with his friends but he remained silent and I couldn't think of a polite way to ask whether or not it was him).

There was also another guy there who I swear is someone famous - muscially famous - but I have NO idea who he is. It's driving me nuts. There's a bad pick of him In the photo on the right. Any ideas?

Strip poker

The night was very "audience participation". If you wanted mardi gras beads, you had to earn them: Flash body parts, get a lap dance (I enjoyed remembering that I'm allowed to touch the guys as they dance!!), play strip poker or Twister, or be in a stage show.

Miss Kittys Twister - Right Hand Crotch

I love that I thought it was completely appropriate to flash my tits with just the slightest provocation - and then to spank guys butts as their way to earn beads from me (whoever ended up with the most beads at the end of the night would win $100)... yet was PISSED that people were smoking inside the club. I think that's the epitome of LA attitude: public nudity = okay, smoking = wrong! Well, except that I didn't think I looked better than everyone else - that is the epitome of LA!

Kim was naughtier than usual - a lot naughtier. Well, maybe not more than usual - just more than when she's with us. And, solely out of respect for her, that's all I'll say on that topic!! (you owe me, kim!)

Late in the night, I was joking around with Kim and Lucas, doing very poor renditions of S Factor moves. Albert Einstein found me again - his friends now sadly without women on their arms. One of them, David, wanted to meet Juls but said she gave him attitude. Kim and I are still trying to figure out what she's looking for - she gives NO clue about her taste. Except, she was seen with "The Humping Chihuahua" - a guy named for his rather annoying dance style (no offense to Rudy and Elvis). This guy is on her every time we go. She claims to hate it yet he always manages to get on her like that (if I hate it, I yell at them and make sure it stops). I saw he was on her, thought "Whatever!" and walked by. She yelled for help so I grabbed her and said we had to find Kim. But later in the night, there he was again. Kim and I decided not to do a thing... especially since she would occassionally get away from him yet still kinda dance with him. She clearly does not hate it as much as she claims.

Juls also ended up exchanging info with "Scottish Pirate Guy" - which I did not understand at all. Kim said Juls likes both scottish men and pirates - so "double score". But the guy was ICKY LOOKING... every time I saw him I'd just think "ewww!" Maybe she didn't give him her real info. If she did, she is never again allowed to make fun of me for what when on at last years OTL tournament (not being repeated here!).

So, Albert, having seen me "earning beads" earlier in the night, got me to flash for him and his friends. It's no big deal to me. My 'tatas' aren't sensitive - I usually say they're about as errogenously sensitive as my elbows. The only reason I don't go topless in public is because it's illegal. So... boobs-boobs-boobs, grab-grab-bite, ha-ha-ha.

A guy we dubbed "Big Red" (very tall and wearing a fierce red-based costume - including a cape made of red "caution" tape) started talking with the rest of our group. Kim smacked his ass (I did so earlier - it was beautiful). I looked away for a min, looked back, and Kim was getting spanked by Big Red. I lined up for my turn - but changed my mind. But then Albert Einstein REALLY wanted to see me spanked - and decide he would go for it himself - so I turned around and bent over onto the bar counter. All I can say is "MY, OH MY!!" At one point, Julie came up and said, "nooo... don't rub her [between swats]... blahblahblah" and I shot back "SHUT THE 'F' UP - HE KNOWS WHAT HE'S DOING!" He left with my real name and real phone number. LOL. He won't call (or he'll wait a month - guys always wait a month before calling me) but he earned the real info! (he was also very nice, very attentive, and seemed intelligent)

Just another boring night in LA

This pic is from the end of the night. This gogo boy had fun approaching people by surprise. I watched as he danced, on the raised platform, so his penis was about 1" from a girl's head - without her realizing it. She finally turned around, ended up with penis in her face, and freaked out better than I've seen in years. It was hysterical! At one point, he encouraged me to stand in front of him. I basically ended up with a mouth full of penis (but it was still in the jock strap so that makes it okay!). His body was amazing (there were a LOT of amazing bodies last night!) so I took the pic for poster(ior)ity's sake.

Right after the pic, I think a rather cool & attractive chick was hitting on me - but I was never quite sure about it. I left shortly thereafter.

I really did need that night out. My ego needed that night out!! I feel physically better (except the knee - the knee is mad) and spiritually refreshed!! Does that make my religion "Sins of the Flesh"?!? I don't mind.